Why Parents Drink...

Discussion in 'Off Topic Lounge' started by bulldogowner, Dec 18, 2010.

  1. bulldogowner

    bulldogowner Destroyer of Spam Moderator

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    Why Parents Drink
    A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to 'Dad.'

    With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.

    Dear Dad:
    It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

    I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.

    But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it's not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant.

    Stacy said that we will be very happy.

    She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

    Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.

    In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

    Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.

    Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren

    Love, Your Son John

    PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house.

    I Just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a Report card That's in my center desk drawer.

    I love you. Call me when it's safe to come home.
  2. jooshman

    jooshman New Member

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    Phew, it's times like this I'm glad I'm not a parent
  3. DanielHillery

    DanielHillery New Member

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    For so many reasons maybe. I guess the problem centralized inside the house. Why don't you ask your parents directly. Problems can be solved through serious communication.
  4. Pho3n1x

    Pho3n1x New Member

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    lol good one
  5. Wojtee

    Wojtee Member

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    :D First time I read this as written by a boy, otherwise this is pretty old (and pretty funny, too).
  6. jackjs

    jackjs New Member

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    Hahahah an oldie but a goodie!
  7. paperdave

    paperdave New Member

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    "Dont worry son....once ive sobered up Ill
    be round to Tommys house "wall1
  8. Orthocc

    Orthocc New Member

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    Hahahahaha that is great. At least the kid has a sense of humor =D
  9. kevmeister

    kevmeister New Member

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    Hahahahahhahahah i heard that before but i still lauthing reading it
  10. Vortex_4200

    Vortex_4200 Member

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    No Jury in the world would convict me!
  11. chengliu

    chengliu Guest

    I guess the problem centralized inside the house.sign1
  12. lensmanx

    lensmanx New Member

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    outstanding! Weird to see your nightmares in print on a forum like that ...