"Once upon a Train"

Discussion in 'The Caboose' started by Virginian, Apr 28, 2001.

  1. roryglasgow

    roryglasgow Active Member

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    ...that the bullet passed right through the heart of the music box dancer. But his nostalgia was interrupted when three men walked up the aisle from the car in front, causing the other passengers to gasp with disbelief; for they were none other than Andy Kaufmann, John Belushi and John Candy! John Candy asked Jessee, "Is this the train to Sheboygan?"

    Jessee was confused for a moment, because they were no where near Wisconsin. John Belushi, impatient with Jessee's slow response, drew his Samurai sword and made unintelligible grunts. He was about to take a swing at Jessee when Andy stepped in and calmed him down. "He's a little upset over the untimely death of some bovine friends of his," Andy told Jessee.

    Just then, the train lurched forward...
  2. Virginian

    Virginian Member

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    when who should board but, amongst a whole crowd of relatives, Prof. Albert Einstein, carrying his...

    [This message has been edited by Virginian (edited 06-23-2001).]
  3. N Gauger

    N Gauger 1:20.3 Train Addict

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    ...set of jewler's screwdrivers. He offeres them to Jessie, and Jessie replies....
  4. jimmybeersa

    jimmybeersa Member

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    ..."The safe in the boxcar aint gonna be opened by this dinky set of screwdrivers ,what I need is a coupla sticks of that "Dymamite" or some of Alfred Nobles Gunpowder and someone with "Horse sence" enough to...
  5. Woodie

    Woodie Active Member

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    .... Uh Oh..... "Faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive. Look... up in the sky, It's a bird, It's a plane, it's....... "
  6. jimmybeersa

    jimmybeersa Member

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    ... its "Superman".....Looking for the Hobby shop to purchase the latest N gauge loco made by .... wait for it...."Pacific Fast Mail."....a branch of "Western Union"....
  7. roryglasgow

    roryglasgow Active Member

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    "Mr. Superman, sir! We have a problem!" said Jessie.

    "What is it, citizen?" replied Superman.

    "Well, we got a safe that's just chock'd full of money that we was going to give to underpriviledged children who ain't got no model trains, and we've plum fergotten the dang'd ol' combination! Can you help us?"

    "Why, yes!" said Superman, standing tall and looking honorable and important.

    Jessie and Superman went to the safe, and Superman easily wrenched open the door.

    "There's a hobby shop that sells the latest N-scale locomotives in the town called Sandy Bottom, about 30 miles in that direction," said Jessie, gesturing in a direction that the train was NOT traveling in.

    "Thank you," said Superman, who exited the train, looking for a Sandy Bottom. (In reality, the name of the town was Soggy Bottom, but Jessie was trying to divert Superman's attention from the robbery.)

    Jessie began scooping up wads of cash from the safe and stuffing them into his pockets. Then, suddenly, the door behind him flew open and...
  8. billk

    billk Active Member

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    the FBI entered, charging them with violating the Mann Act (transporting a gull across a sedate lion for immoral porpoises)...
  9. roryglasgow

    roryglasgow Active Member

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    And then all of the agents were struck by lightning and killed instantly for making such an unruly pun (kzzzzzzzzaaacck!! Ow!)
  10. N Gauger

    N Gauger 1:20.3 Train Addict

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    and while their bodies were still cooling down, Who should enter the car but.......
  11. jimmybeersa

    jimmybeersa Member

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    ... Santa Clause , who had been caught in the lightning storm and lost his sleigh and and all the train sets he had to deliver on Xmass eve,Alas, Alas what was he to do......
  12. Woodie

    Woodie Active Member

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    .... SO he commenced to "Jingle dem bells", "Jingle dem bells" Jingle dem all the way to .....
  13. Woodie

    Woodie Active Member

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    ...... "Ohwotfun".....

    It is to ride on a one whore soapen lay!!

    (Where is Ohwotfun.... In Joizee???) [​IMG]
  14. jimmybeersa

    jimmybeersa Member

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    ..."Ohwotfun" it would be to be back on the train with Jessie James and the gang,Superman,Santa Clause, the FBI and all those others who came along for the ride not forgetting the Hollywood Director with his Cast and Crew and last but not least the Music Box with the bullet hole......
  15. jimmybeersa

    jimmybeersa Member

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    ....The followers of this Train sure have lost any interest in us said the Engineer to the Fireman/Stoker so what say we......
  16. scudrunr

    scudrunr New Member

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    ...give jesse's N-scale layout to Santa so he can have a nice christmas and the rest of the people on the train can finish with their robbery but still get a gift from santa. But look a Hobo just jumped into the car...
  17. Woodie

    Woodie Active Member

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    ...... The Littlest Hobo...... WOOOF.... he said....
  18. jimmybeersa

    jimmybeersa Member

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    ......"any one got a TooT" and began to scratch around looking for...
  19. scudrunr

    scudrunr New Member

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    ...a place to releve himself, the perfect place was on...
  20. N Gauger

    N Gauger 1:20.3 Train Addict

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    ...Santa's sleigh, Santa was Not Amused... in fact he ......