Why are guys so competitive??

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hiyatran

New Member
This guy I hang out with always try to one up on me on everything from video games, to soccer, to bowling, to board games. OK I know you are bigger, stronger and better then me, but I think you need to be a gentlemen and lose once in a while because it can be a little annoying at times.

Are all guys like this??
 

SEBRET

Member
just about all of them. However, most of them know to back off on the ego crap when it comes to the other gender.
 

RocketmanTan

Well-Known Member
Most people are like that in nature. It is simply etiquette that keeps most from being such--pardon my language-- jackasses. I had the same exact situation as you, and what I did was I made the guy look like an egoistical buffoon who needs to get a life. If all else fails, pound his ass in something you're good at (I'm guessing it's paper modeling :mrgreen:)

Good luck!

--Bryan "Opposite over Adjacent" Tan
 

uradodah

New Member
Isn't it funny how the people with the highest self esteem are the ones that shouldn't have it? They think too much of themselves.

I used to side with Bryan - just above my post - but have changed my opinion/attitude as I've grown slightly older. Today, unless they're doing - or saying - something truly harmful to someone, I just let people be themselves. You're never going to change them - only THEY can change themselves.

Specific to the first post, in my opinion, stop doing the things (activities) that lead to your friend's overly competitive responses/actions without confronting him. He'll either get the hint and ask why you're not doing them or he'll just go do them with someone else. That said, when/if he asks you why you're not doing them anymore, you have to be honest and let him know - WITHOUT any attitude.

Lastly, if you do talk to him, don't talk for anyone else but yourself. Too many people try to drive home a point by saying things like "other people feel the same way" or "Tim, Tom, Cindy and Jill have said the same things." Remember - it's the responsibility of those other people to address THEIR issues with him, not yours.

Good luck!
 

poorleno

New Member
I don't know to be honest, but with other guys it is about showing someone up sometimes, I only do that with friends when playing sports or something but it is just for fun, at least with me.
 

goodduck

Well-Known Member
hiyatrin, I'm going to assume you are not a guy but a little girl, or a young lady not yet in high school. Have not taken Social Sciences class yet. Cause, if you are a guy..... then you are a cry baby! Stop crying! That's just life! Competitiveness is part of human nature. Specially for us guys. And it is boat load of fun to beat down some guys on gaming. As long as you are the one doing the beating. Show no mercy on the guys. They don't need it, and they won't ask. If they do ask for mercy. Kick them when they are down anyway. Then kick them again. But life don't always goes your way. So, live to fight again. Don't give up. You will get better. Next time, your turn to do the beating. And be sure to kick him when he down. But most of all don't be a cry baby! No one like to game with a cry baby.
 

Greenman

New Member
I believe that often people are trying to prove mostly to them selves. Not always because they have the highest of self esteems. Rather, they may be compensating for a lack of self esteem.

Competition is fun and challenging when it's mutually balanced. Not so much when its driven into the ground (or kicked into you when you're down).
Those who compete the most and most harshly, aren't necessarily doing so to prove a point to you, but to prove a point to their own psyche. In short, there may be some insecurity issues...especially if you bear the brunt of the competition.

I used to side with Bryan - just above my post - but have changed my opinion/attitude as I've grown slightly older. Today, unless they're doing - or saying - something truly harmful to someone, I just let people be themselves. You're never going to change them - only THEY can change themselves.

Specific to the first post, in my opinion, stop doing the things (activities) that lead to your friend's overly competitive responses/actions without confronting him. He'll either get the hint and ask why you're not doing them or he'll just go do them with someone else. That said, when/if he asks you why you're not doing them anymore, you have to be honest and let him know - WITHOUT any attitude.

I agree with Uradodah. Avoid the competition, or choose an activity where the competition is balanced (or in your favor). If you win, show him what a better person can be like...be gracious.

Remember that in team sports the competing teams have the same number of players. Boxers and wrestlers weigh in the same weight category. An experienced chess player cannot compete fairly against a novice. Competition is not competition if the challenge is not the same for both sides.

One last thing. A man should know when to stop showing off and when the competition is won or lost.

As said before, good luck.
 
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