"once upon a time.."

[Virginian]

Once upon a time...

[Dave Flinn]

three railfans went to visit...

[wt&c]

.. Cranberry grade, on the WV/MD border...

------------------
NARA Member #8
www.a&a.77th.com/ (http://www.a&a.77th.com/)
The Appalachian & Atlantic Railroad
"QUALITY at WORK with SAFTEY in MIND"

[Voice]

not too far from..

[Biggerhammer]

...a bridge over a deep chasm called ...

[Virginian]

'The Lost Brakeman's gorge'

[N Gauger]

The "Gorge" was interesting not only for the legend of "The Lost Brakeman" but in the fact that it was.......

[wt&c]

bridge shared by the RF&P, The B&O and the OR&E (ancestor of A&A Co.)

------------------
NARA Member #8
www.a&a.77th.com/ (http://www.a&a.77th.com/)
The Appalachian & Atlantic Railroad
"QUALITY at WORK with SAFTEY in MIND"

[Woodie]

...... and being from their ancestral age, built the bridge out of...........

[Dave Flinn]

timbers and toothpicks...

[Drew1125]

Popcicle sticks, coffee stirs, & in later years was reinforced with....

[wt&c]

....papercl

[Woodie]

..... strings and ceiling wax and other fancy stuff.... So Puff the Magic Loco...

[N Gauger]

...who lived by the Gorge, decided to take a little trip, across the bridge and around the hills & dales all the way to...........

[Woodie]

.... all bound for Moo Moo Land... Moo Moo Land... They're justified and their ancient. and they like to roam the land..... (KLF and Tammy Winette, Last Train to Trans-Central for the reference!) TOOT TOOT..
They're justified and they're ancient and they ......

[Drew1125]

movin' down the line...

[Virginian]

a-switchin' and a swayin' up and back and down and around 'til, low and behold he...

[Drew1125]

saw, right there, sittin' on the main line was a...

[Woodie]

.... damsel in distress, tied to the track. "My gosh" she screamed. "It's a....

[wt&c]

OR&E 2-6-0T!!!

------------------
NARA Member #8
www.a&a.77th.com/ (http://www.a&a.77th.com/)
The Appalachian & Atlantic Railroad
"QUALITY at WORK with SAFTEY in MIND"

[Drew1125]

"Just my luck", she thought, "it's got a set of 'blind' drivers, & a ...a ... is that a....?"

[Dave Harris]

Guy by the name of Snidely Whiplash I see

------------------
L V Dave

[Woodie]

followed by a .... (or 'an' to ensure correct grammar!) ....

[Voice]

...guy named Long, Lean Lanky John???

[Woodie]

"It is!!!.. It is!" "They've come to resuce me", she thought.. "Over here! Over here" "you dim blind wits"... "No use putting on any lippie or eyshadow" she thought... "Now... where's my....."

[Virginian]

.."my oh my, they're not rescuing me, oh dear, these are bad, bad meanies.Oh! where oh where is Big Slim Liveright, the.. .

[Drew1125]

"...the slow walkin', slow talkin' &%$#@!? - I'll bet he's..."

[Drew1125]

"...slow walkin', slow talkin' &%$#@!? - I'll bet he's..."

[Virginian]

.."playin' with those dumb ol' trains of his again! Just like a Hero to...

[N Gauger]

......want to play around, and wait, until just the last second, the perfect time, to...........

[Woodie]

.... call everyone out on strike. Our industrial demands are.....

[Drew1125]

...simple: more money, less work! Hey, we've got railroads to run, for Pete's sake! And you know what they say about runnin' a railroad...

[N Gauger]

..."No job's over until the 'paperwork's' done"... But runnin' a railroad is....

[Woodie]

.... in need of the influence of a good woman. "Hit the skids".... SCREEEEEEEEECH!.. "Hey Mrs Distress.. Get up offa dem tracks. We need a new railroad Director" "Your first job will be to......."

[This message has been edited by Woodie (edited 04-08-2001).]

[Virginian]

take ol' Slim here down to the yard office. He could use a...

[Biggerhammer]

... double espresso, that'll speed him right up.

[Biggerhammer]

Of course, you all remember what happened LAST time Slim had that much caffeine in him...

[Voice]

...he made Cranberry Grade...

[Dave Harris]

Into Ocean Spray Tunnel

------------------
L V Dave

[N Gauger]

it was a looooong Tunnel & a LooooonG story, but first we should mention............

[Drew1125]

...the warning label on the espresso stating that, "this product should not be used by steam engineers on steep grades, or..."

[N Gauger]

...damsels in distress - that were recently appointed directors! So that of course means.......

[Voice]

its time to get out the...

[Sir_Prize]

...WORD FROM OUR SPONSOR...
We would like to demonstrate the wonerful new
improved, faster, larger, more efficient,
longer lasting, bigger container,....

[Virginian]

..Battle Star Gondola, with tripple action, double bay, rotating...

[Woodie]

photon torpedoes that are very useful for....

[Drew1125]

...clearing the main line, &...

[Biggerhammer]

... it whitens your teeth, too. Just don't try to run it on a DCC layout, because...

[Dave Flinn]

...it will do just the opposite of what you expect. That is, unless you spill some of that caffein-containing liquid in just the right spot to short circuit everything...

[Virginian]

Unless, of course, there's a lovely damsel in distress tied to the tracks and your radio cab control's...

[Drew1125]

...experiencing technical difficulties, & instead of stopping the train, it's just making your neighbor's garage door go up & down &...

[This message has been edited by Charlie (edited 04-19-2001).]

[N Gauger]

.......opening & closing a couple of nearby missle silos. You can still take a lonnnng deeeeep breath and yell at the Top Of Your Lungs!!.......

[Biggerhammer]

... "the bombs are alive ... with the sound of music!" Missiles really like that, it's their second-favorite musical. Their favorite, of course, is...

[Virginian]

'Singin' in the Rain', esp. the part where Gene Kelly swings around the light pole, 'cause it reminds them of...

[Drew1125]

...that time they appointed that damsel as director, & everybody got all jacked up on espresso, &...

[Woodie]

...... damn that Sal.... Now she's taken over the ...

[LC]

the office, the dinning car, and she's throwing #2 bunker fuel on the coal pile.
Look out!!!! She lighting a match!!

[Woodie]

"sorry darl" interjects the Chief Dispatcher. "this is a non-smoking section. You will have to move to the rear of the train".

[Drew1125]

...and with that, she calmly snubbed her cigarette out on the dispatcher's chin, & walked smartly back to the...

[Woodie]

.... tracks, tied herself down, and screamed, "Go on.....

[Virginian]

"I've been workin' on the railroad",...

[Drew1125]

Oh yeah? Well, around here, we don't come in late, & go home early, we work all the $#@!ing live long day!! And furthermore...

[Woodie]

.... "gimme back my cab controller. I'm in charge here. Now.... which button is forward again?" "Oooops... I've pushed the....

[Virginian]

..back to the future button, and now I...

[Voice]

seem to be wandering aimlessly in a gorge...

[N Gauger]

....that has a small bridge across it, looking for the wabash cannonball, which was last seen pulling...........

[Woodie]

...... up the flex track that Dam Sel had laid too close to the......

[N Gauger]

...edge of the world...err...platform, forming a long.....

[Woodie]

..... a long queue of new members joining the "Flat Earth Society", of which Dam Sel became President after being fired as Chairman. After all, Dam Sel proved the existence of the flat Earth when along with the corporations most prized engine, she ...

[Voice]

...found out the hard way that grues really DO like the dark by...

[Biggerhammer]

... candlelight. It's just so romantic! The only thing a grue could think was more romantic than a candlelit evening cruise would be...

[N Gauger]

...nice long trip on an M1, through a nice loooong tunnel. But then we would have to find.....

[Woodie]

.... HO scale candles, cutlery, waiter, and that special.......

[Biggerhammer]

meal for that special someone. The problem, though, is that when you cook a plastic steak (in 1/87th scale) it turns to goo and smoke. So instead, find a special someone who likes...

[Voice]

to make trees, and trees...and MORE trees....

[Woodie]

..... and more trees, and after making some trees, make some more trees, and then some trees, and trees, and trees, and finally after making that last tree, make some more trees......

[Voice]

until Shamus's loggers....

[Woodie]

...... sympathised with the Greenies, all went on strike so the could......

[N Gauger]

... watch the "making of the trees" and then go......

[Woodie]

.... and have Maccers for lunch, put on their Nike's and off to the M1 protest marches, catching the 12.42 PM upline to....